GOLDEN VALLEY, Minn. - For eight years Kate Arends has lived the most beautiful life, online.
Her lifestyle blog Wit and Delight is incredibly popular. Her Instagram posts regularly get thousands of ‘likes.’ Her work and photos are flawless. But don't mistake her images for her reality.
It can be hard to imagine that the woman behind the curated, styled and seemingly perfect life, struggles.
“Biggest way I found to enjoy my life is to accept the things that are sometimes hard to accept in ourselves,” said Arends.
Kate Arends' life online is just that: Delightfully joyous and delicious. Which is precisely why she posted a blog about her reality in that very context.
“That's a place where people talk about only the good things that are happening in their lives. It’s important to remember that behind all of the glossiness there is [sic] real people,” described Arends. “Posting it there is also a reminder that it doesn't always have to be okay and I wanted to make sure that that community had the opportunity to have that conversation with me.”
Arends has struggled with depression for years; for too long in the shadows without ever talking about it, and that only made it worse. Which is why she is adamant about talking about it now. She wants to make sure those in the shadows now know they can come out.
“The benefit that I have gotten from being more vulnerable with people who I'm close to has been so much greater than the fear of being judged. I want other people to experience that, and if I can help people get there, that's a cool thing,” expressed Arends.
Arends took it one step further in a recent post about post-partum depression.
“As soon as I got pregnant that was something that in my mind I thought ‘okay there is going to be a hurdle here,’” said Arends. “In fact, before I got help, I didn't want to have children because I was so afraid to pass on that type of life experience, what happened to me, onto someone else. [It was a] sign of how much I was hurting inside.”
Talking about may not make mental health conditions go away, but it does matter.
“I like talking about it now instead of thinking about oh I hope it doesn't happen to me,” said Arends.