MINNEAPOLIS — From school board meeting fights, to unruly passengers on flights, this past year adults have been at each other's throats.
This October, during National Bullying Prevention Month, KARE 11's Eva Andersen spoke with a local therapist on how to talk to your children about what they're seeing play out.
Lizzie Fenske, MSW, LICSW, is a mental health therapist at CARE Counseling in St. Louis Park. She says it's important for parents to not shy away from the conversation.
"Children are very much like sponges: they see it all, they soak it up, and if we refuse to talk about it, the child might think, 'oh that’s not something we speak about' and not be able to process some of the emotions that they felt," Fenske said.
Fenske said parents should take the time to ask their children to identify their emotions.
"It can be really scary for a child to see a parent react and then immediately the parent assumes the child feels the same way," she said. "So being curious around these things and asking questions. Providing a safe space."
But what if you, as the parent, make a mistake, lose your temper, or step over the line, and your child sees it? Fenske says that, too, can be a teaching moment.
"One of the most important things we can do is take ownership over our actions," said Fenske. "So even if it’s something that we maybe did in the heat of the moment, it’s important for us to convey to our kids, 'Hey, I’m responsible for my actions and my part in this situation.'"
A final rule of thumb: taking deep breaths and pausing can go a long way.
"It's as simple as thinking about 'stop,'" Fenske said. "Stopping in your tracks, creating space so that I can go from my emotional mind to my rational mind. Our mind is a really powerful thing."